If God Already Knows, Why Does He Want Us to Pray?

Matthew 6:8 is a sentence a sharp child can turn around on you. "Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him." So he knows. Then why ask?

Lily asked me some version of that last week, and my first answer was that asking is polite. She let me know with a look that this wouldn't do. I went back to the verse and then to two other places, and here is what I found.

What the verse is answering

Read verse 7 first, since verse 8 begins with "therefore."

But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking. (Matthew 6:7)

The people Jesus describes pile up words because they think volume gets them heard. The Father already knowing what you need means you can skip all that and pray plainly. Verse 8 says nothing about whether to pray at all.

Then he gives them a prayer, and nearly every line of it asks for something. "Give us this day our daily bread" is verse 11. Forgive us, lead us not into temptation, deliver us. Verse 8 says the Father knows, and by verse 11 Jesus has them asking for bread anyway, so any answer to Lily has to fit both verses.

What the Bible Dictionary says prayer is for

The Bible Dictionary entry on prayer takes the question head on. It isn't scripture, being the study help printed in the back of the Church's edition of the Bible, and it gives the plainest answer I've found.

Prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other. The object of prayer is not to change the will of God but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant but that are made conditional on our asking for them.

The second sentence took me a few readings, because nothing in it has us informing God or talking him into anything. The blessing is already waiting, and asking for it is the condition. A few lines later the entry says "Blessings require some work or effort on our part before we can obtain them. Prayer is a form of work and is an appointed means for obtaining the highest of all blessings."

The entry also names where our confusion comes from: "Many of the so-called difficulties about prayer arise from forgetting this relationship," meaning that God is our Father and we are his children. If you picture prayer as a message to a distant office, wondering why you'd send it to someone who already has the file is fair. Lily asking me for a snack when I can see she's hungry is a different thing. She wants to be the one who says it, and I want to hear her say it.

"Correspondence" in that first sentence means two wills brought into line. When Lily prays for something she has to put it into words, and I think that is how she finds out whether she really wants it.

What Amulek says to pray about

Alma 34 has a long list of places to pray. Amulek is speaking to people who have been cast out because of their poverty (verse 40). Before the list, in verses 17 through 19, he asks them to exercise faith unto repentance and cry for mercy, and he tells them to humble themselves. Then he gets to the fields.

Cry unto him when ye are in your fields, yea, over all your flocks. Cry unto him in your houses, yea, over all your household, both morning, mid-day, and evening. (Alma 34:20-21)

Fields and flocks, the household and, in verse 23, even the devil. Verse 26 mentions closets and secret places. Not one item on the list is there to tell God something he doesn't know.

I had never really noticed verse 27.

Yea, and when you do not cry unto the Lord, let your hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him continually for your welfare, and also for the welfare of those who are around you.

Even in the hours when you aren't speaking, he wants the heart kept pointed at him, and it is meant to carry the people around you. Verse 28 follows straight on and says your prayer is vain if you turn away the needy and the sick.

What I'd tell a child

He doesn't need the information, so I wouldn't pretend he does. I'd tell her what the Bible Dictionary says. He has good things ready and has asked us to reach for them, and reaching is how we find out what we want and who we're talking to. Lily has asked a related question before, why God made us at all, and I wrote about what I tell my kids God made us for. Both answers come down to him wanting us to come to him, and prayer is one of the ways we do.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does Matthew 6:8 mean I don't have to ask?

No. The verse is about not stacking up words to impress God, and three verses later Jesus teaches a prayer made almost entirely of requests.

If prayer doesn't change God's mind, why do I ever get an answer?

The Bible Dictionary says the blessings are ones God is already willing to give, and that they depend on our asking. I don't claim to know why he set it up that way. That is only how the entry puts it.

What if it feels like nobody's listening?

Alma 34 doesn't take up that situation, so I can't offer a verse for it. Verse 27 does say to keep your heart drawn out to him continually, and Matthew 6 gives you a short prayer to start from when you have no words of your own.

Should kids pray out loud or in their heads?

The scriptures I used here don't say. Alma 34 mentions praying over your household and in your closets, and Jesus in Matthew 6 says to pray plainly. Let a child start whichever way she's comfortable with, and tell her God hears either.

When a kid asks you this, don't defend God's knowledge. Open Matthew 6 and read her verses 8 through 13, where Jesus says the Father already knows and then gives a prayer full of asks. Then tell her to pick one plain thing she wants tonight and ask for it by name.

with love, Melissa